The Feinstone Report 1/19/03
To those that still read this B.S.,
Wonderful weekend, wasn't it my freinds. Not only did we have the wonderful music of Pedestrian featuring Greg Loftis, but the afterhours was not bad either.
Friday, was a good night. I mean what a better contest to have for our freinds than a battle of the bands where the more you drink, the more you support your favorite band. It was no contest when it comes to dedicated conisuier's of alcoholic beverages. Also, Pedestrian was the best band there.
So friday was had at the Royal Grove for the battle of the bands. Lots of drinks were purchased in the support of our favorite band, and it also gives us the authority to party like rockstars. Afterhours was at MikeyB's place and there was a keg. The lovely Lori transported and tapped this beast herself, what a girl. People came and went. McMurtry should have shown us his cream bikini, but didn't. It was mentioned that the cattle truck rolled in with the fat chicks. Marty didn't break a leg with his old buddy and no one had hot tub sex, even though the guy that did it was there. At about 6a.m. Bruning decided to go on one of his stupid binges at the bars in the morning. Wingert, and Lori Wood came along and Wingert made new freinds at Harry's before getting kicked out of the spigot.
Saturday night came too quickly with another Pedestrian show at the Music Box in Omaha. Enchondo was a good show also, and the Budweiser rep was in our favor. Went to that guy named Nick's house in Omaha for afterhours. It was the Nick that was in the band, you think Nick Maser would get permission to have a party anymore? That is about as feasable as him quitting smoking. Anyhow, it was a sweet ass pad and had a basement that resemble that of "The Lodge" with the wood paneling. One could only hope that "The Lodge" was that cool. Therer were some cool people to be met. Too bad Kenny was too intent on finding guys to get his shit packed, I mean together, to get a keg for the party. It went off well anyhow. Hot women, cold weather. There was a girl named Chrystal, I think, that favored the bigger man opposed to GREG LOFTIS. Wooooo, bet that doesn't happen everyday. Hey, Bruning, Hawthorne, and Toalson? How does it feel to have a girl persue you? Well, I mean Marty, a girl your age. You sly young girl attracting bastard. It was a cool party, the cops even came and told us so. But, Nick was just a little weird to be a true party host.
Sunday came like an ex-girlfreind showing up at your fiancee's house. Kind of unexpected, and awkward. First thing that comes to mind is , Strohli is still in Omaha with Jolene. Jolene, what a crazy girl, she likes belt's and urine. She needs a big hug and a teddy bear, or a trip to Chucky Cheeses. Strohli coming back home and going to the bar; whether it be to Jack's or the Pla Mor ballroom, was a good winding down perioid with some beers to calm the animal that was in us. Afterward, if you went to 23rd and Holdredge, there was a pony keg (the fuck why). So, a drunken good time was had and we found out that Jason Lee has a secret admirer. Also, that Marty needs to get his "shit together" and stop sleeping on the couch, according to a more astute person that hangs out with us. So, Greg, supposedly has a girlfreind, and Strohli is leaving soon. We will miss him (like a chapped ass) kidding, we will.
So, this next weekend, and the next Feinstone report will be dedicated to our New Jersey freind. The man, the myth, the legend. That guy who thought we were crazy in drinking if only we were breathing. The man who thought country dancing was a thing that was only on T.V. Andrew Strohli. So, let Kenny's going away party be a cornerstone of life. No more gay guy to make fun of, and no more stories of a fish out of water like Strohli.
Love you, miss you, give us all a completely heterosexual hugs when leaving.
That concludes another weekend of total pleasure. I enjoy the feedback I have been getting, and if anyone has any comentary, I would be proud to throw out a column in with your name on it, or anonymously. The more you contribute, the more you feel a part of the "Feinstone Institute".
Good luck, and don't get arrested.
Assanine is my flavor,
Dr. Mitch Feinstone,
attorney at flaw
"You are not your bank account. You are not your fucking Khaki's. You are the all singing, all dancing crap of the world." Tyler Durden (watch fight club, you'll like it)